Date started crying, a woman who was the wrong shape.

1) What is the worst that can happen?

This is the first-ever dating nightmare story as the owner of one of my own. My name is Justin and I have a shocking dating history.

I met someone in Msn chat rooms she was called Jennifer X well that was my name for her it was part of her email address by the way nothing rude.

We used to speak on the phone a fair bit and text one day she said I am going to the Meadowhall shopping center near you we should meet up, I was apprehensive but she sent me the fatal line what is the worst that can happen? i did think at the time good point.

We had not seen a pic of each other which seems crazy I know but that’s how it was those days. you would ask someone if they had pictures they say no scanner sorry.

No camera phones no apps, it was the 1990s Google it or ask your dad!

We met in the pub she was pretty hot to be fair she looked like baby spice, but when she saw me she looked horrified, this was not a good sign, I am sensitive I can pick up on these things.

I bought some drinks and it was fine we had a laugh we got on, things were going well we kept drinking, they were going great we kept drinking and we were talking about moving on somewhere else, I was thinking woohoo I might be in with a shot here.

Then I think we drank too much when she started telling me about her problems, suddenly wind beneath my wings by Boyzone or one of those rubbish bands came on the jukebox. When she announced this was me and my and my ex’s song and burst into tears…

I have to say I was not really not prepared for this I was defiantly out of my depth, I cannot remember what happened after this very clearly I am traumatised by it.

She recovered she played with her phone said she was leaving shook my hand weirdly and left I never heard from her ever again, I mean never ever one word.

I always remember at this point her words saying what have you got to lose, I remember thinking my sanity!

Now, this was an awful experience as a guy I was totally gutted about how it went, the next day drove to see my friend Mr. Stuart.

I told him the whole sorry story I could see he was at first smiling and then his shoulders started shaking, he had tears running down his face he was laughing so hard, I laughed too and I wasn’t gutted anymore.

So I actually made two people laugh in the space of 24 hours has to be some kind of record I reckon.

2) Pictures can lie.

I met a girl online we spoke on MSN messenger she had lots of like headshot model photos she looked pretty and hot they were like professional photos, she came to my house for a drink I saw her through the door and she was exactly like her photos, I was like wow.

Unfortunately, when I opened the door I was in for a shock, as she was slim all the way down to her waist, but her ass was massive and her legs, I mean massive I couldn’t actually figure out what had happened maybe she had some kind of accident or something.

I did not query this I am a gentleman!

Honestly, I had so many pictures going around in my mind thinking how do I tackle this, we never saw each other again, I realise I am not a nice person for having these feelings but I did feel kind of duped.

To this day I’ve never seen anyone close to this shape before live or dead.

3) You are just not my type….

Met someone online we had a laugh shared pictures, I met her in a bar she announced that she only likes big black guys, as a skinny white guy you can imagine I was a little shocked..

4) Playing the field 

I met up for a date with a girl in a bar I gave her a fun birthday card she didn’t get the joke which I thought was a bit weird. Then went on to tell me about how excited she is for her date with another guy she has lined up next week.

5) Careful with those images

I was chatting online to a girl with a weird name, she sent me a picture of herself she was wearing a baby nappy, I was laughing quite hard at this saved the image to my phone to send to my friend. I got mixed up and accidentally sent the image to my dad instead, it was never mentioned.

6)The date who never spoke to me once.

I met this girl online she was from a very rough area, she called me from her home it was like there was a rave on I could barely hear her, I was a little worried this could be a sign of things to come.

She asked me to meet her in the pub, I turned up and half her family was there as well as her brother and cousins, she didn’t speak one word to me just danced on her own in the pub, she was the only person dancing by the way.

We went to several bars I tried to speak to her but she ignored me and never said one word to me. I ended up speaking to her family all night it was a little boring and I wanted to leave.

They were all getting some food I saw my chance while they were all distracted I legged it… I heard them shouting he’s running away I never looked back, with relief running through my mind that the night was over.

7) The price just went up

I was speaking to a girl on Tinder she was nice but said it would cost me £20 for a night of fun as she called it, I was left thinking I have never had this kind of offer before and left the room I heard my phone ping from another message from tinder, the next message said actually you better make it £50.

8) Lapdancer with attitude

So a friend I knew organised a blind date for me it was with a lap dancer who was from the UK but worked in Holland, I met her in a bar she had a skinhead and was reading a book when I turned up, I thought this could be interesting, I had told her what I looked like and that I was 5.11 tall, I was perfectly honest.

Except what happened was we said hello and an argument ensued, her saying there is no way your 5.11 tall and why did I lie about my height, this went on some time before things calmed down, but the date was already ruined…

Fast forward 10 years later I am in the Dr’s office they give me a medical I am told to stand against the wall while they measure my height, the lady said you’re 6 feet tall, I was like in your face lap dancer the nurse looked a little shocked.

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